It is only natural as a parent to expect from your kids. After all, it’s not just about their own life, is it? You live a bit of your life through them. The most probable reason why parents burden their children with expectations is that they try to achieve whatever they couldn’t on their own. For example, if you wanted to be a professor in a college and couldn’t reach those heights for some reason, you want your child to achieve that. The problem crops up when your child is not academically inclined at all!
Parents who can’t handle their expectations for kids have a very rough life ahead. The first step in this direction is that you end up alienating the very child from whom you are expecting this and that. Children feel terrible when they are unable to meet your expectations. They feel that they are letting you down and this feeling stems strongly from a sense of love. However, this disappointment doesn’t last long. Before you know it, the child becomes bitter and all their love for you turns sour. They feel that they are being unduly put to task.
More often than not, the reason your child can’t meet your expectation is because of you! After all, you have contributed to the genetic structure of the child, something that is largely responsible for ability and intelligence. So, if you are not able or intelligent enough, the child may already be at a disadvantage. There are welcome exceptions, but what if those are not in your case? In other words, you are putting the blame on your child for something which you are responsible, and something that the child has no control over.
If you feel persistent as a parent to keep expecting the skies and the stars for your child, you should consult a psychologist. A trained psychologist, like those with us at the best psychological counselling center in Kolkata Moner Alo, will help you keep a handle your expectations and how to encourage and motivate your child with positive energy. Keeping them under pressure to perform will only pull them down, instead of enhancing their achievement. On the other hand, a level-headed parent is so much more healthy for a child’s development.